RASPUTIN!

Ein Rasputin war in meinem Apartment, jetzt ist er tot. Igh. Ich mag Rasputin nicht. Rasputin ist grusig. Scheint als würde ich jetzt officiell in LA wohnen. Ratten? Mäuse? Kakerlaken? Nein, die Dinger leben in NY, hier haben wir Rasputin. Eckelfiech. Und es taucht einfach auf und ist dennoch gifting. und grusig. Jetzt will ich nicht mehr schlafen. Ight, Rasputin.

A couple of blocks down...

Skype is a wonderful invention. You can call people overseas and see them, or you can just have random conversations with people a couple of blocks away, because all of you are too lazy to leave the house. Thank you skype.

Dear headaches,

For the last approximate 48 hours I had one lasting head ache. Thank you. It has been amazing. Not that I would have a shit tone of work, no not at all, a weekend in bed, was exactly what I needed. I probably was, it sucks anyways.
Staring at this screen doesn't make it any better haha - but it has to vanish at one point, right? Right.
At least I've gotten more sleep then ever. Not really a surprise, when you can hardly get out of bed. It will all be fine. I got all my re-writes done. So at least we have one thing off the list. Yey. Now I'm gonna see if I can get ten more minutes of sleep and then do the rest.
Go away headache, go AWAY!

Lake Tahoe

Within the last 24 hours I got obsessed with Lake Tahoe. It's just weird to know that I won't be coming home this summer, and as weird as it sounds, I miss the calmness and the lake, so Tahoe would be the perfect substitute. Let's see if I have the time and money to go. For now I'm just dreaming a bit. A cottage in the forrest, and the lake right down the street, it sounds so calming. And everyone who's been there sais it's amazing.
Maybe I'll go in fall. I haven't seen the colored leaves in quiet some time.

pictures: Beautiful places to visit

The song is debatable, the video is brilliantly shot.
That's all I'm gonna say to that.

Seperat People

Working with your friends is hard. It makes you become schizophren. I think I made it even harder on myself because I'm working with my two best friends down here. I just can't talk about this project ALL the time, it makes me go insane.
And it seems that we're loosing touch about what's actually happening in each others live because this project is taking over our live.
Never mind, back to work.
At least I have music to keep me calm:

To tame champagne and creatures of the night

It is an addiction, but it is a good one:

Not before the work is done.

My hair is getting long, really long, and I have to admit, that even though there's nothing that could ever compare to my short hair, I'm liking it. I haven't had long hair in a really long time (two years) and it seems to give me my calm back. More groundedness, more control, more calm.
I like to be the outgoing person I am, the crazy little thing that always does something, the creative brain, that's my short hair. Always there, and sometimes even in your face, my long hair is more of the sensitive side of me. Yes things have to be done, but they have to be done with care, I am less in your face and more observant, more calm, I will not flip if you tell me somethings not possible but sit there and in a calm tone find a way that it will be possible.
Sure, both of those sides are always present, but looking in the mirror I can identivy with one of those sides more, and that's exactly why my hair will not be cut till this work is done.
Walking around in flats.
Life is good.
Nadine

And then good things happen.

Today is a good day. It is 4/20 and I got my approved visa today. YAY!
OPT! Another year in the states.
This is good. Now I can start working on everything, plan everything out, make it work. This is good. This is a good day.
I'll have a glass of wine, enjoy the summer sun and get some work done.

Have a wonderful weekend lovely people
xoxo

PS: Congratulations to Garrett and Gertie, may you have a wonderful life together. All the best for your wedding.

If you don’t believe in angles

You will never fly

And if you don’t believe in death

Then you might not ever die.

Deadlines

I think I mentioned before that I'm not a huge fan of deadlines. Well, they're making me go insane. 1.5 hours to go, till everything has to be done. It makes me turn into crazy hair woman:

Yes, I'm still not allowed to cut my hair for another month. But I wanted to test long hair out anyway and it is getting long, really long. like oh my god long. Now imagine taking headshots with hair like that. Well, that's what Filip and I did yesterday, because - yes, not only am I working on my play for the fringe but my grad play is coming up. And we need headshots for that. I enjoy standing behind a camera way better then in front of it haha
but they turned out all right.
Voilà:

Und dann wurde Grössenwahn Productions entwickelt, ich mag das Wort 'unastablished' nicht.

Not quiet sure I know what I'm doing anymore...

Living is a great thing, it really is, working too, but I'm not a huge fan of deadlines. Suddenly everything needs to be done - by midnight, and no one seems reachable - great. That's what you get from trying to have a life!
No worries, I'm just freaking out for a bit, I'll be fine.
It just has a weird touch to it when suddenly you cannot seem to reach your freking cast members to verify how they want their names spelled in the guide. Or you struggle with the fact that those Americans measure everything in fucking inches and stuff like that. I'm glad they count the same way otherwise I would need to make sure that 300 characters really mean 300 characters.
Whatever.
Plus my apartment is filled with smoke from the Photoshoot for the Flyer. I don't like the smell of smoke, so I decided to freez while I have my window and my door and everything open (since the attack on my apartment with the Febreez spray backfired on me and my apartment was not livable in for about 20 minutes).
But whatever, everything will be fine. It needs to, it has to, it will.
I think I'm done bitching and I'll get back to work.
Thanks a lot and enjoy.
If you wondering what I'm all so freaking out about, look at this - Fringe - The Relationship Play.

Flyer

Poster

Bibbern, zittern, bangen.

Die OPT's werden ausgeteilt. Es ist Nervenaufreibend. Die meisten werden garantiert und grundsätzlich sind die Chancen es nicht zu bekommen viel zu klein, doch es passiert. Heute wurde Victoria das OPT versagt. Fuck. I'm sorry, weiss nicht genau wie man das anders ausdrücken soll.
Doch wirklich! Was soll das alles?! Zwei Jahre hier und dann erwarten die das du einfach wieder ausreist? Nicht mehr zurück kommst? Gott im Himmel!
Nun ja. Bei mir ist noch nichts entschieden, noch keine Nachricht, nichts, doch nun erschreckt mich allein der Gedanke daran. Mir fehlt ja die Schweiz schon, doch ich will nicht wirklich wieder zurück müssen. Noch sechs Wochen. AHHHHH!
Nur nicht ausflippen. Alles kommt gut. Gedanken Gedanken.
Viel liebe
Nadine

Socks, Faith and Destiny.

Die Schönheit von Worten

Goethe. Gott im Himmel. 3 Stunden research, aber das ist gut. Soviele wunderbare Worte.
Goethe war ein sehr verwirrter Mann, das muss man ihm lassen, Bindungsunfähig und Verwirrt, doch einer der grössten deutschen Literaren die jeh gelebt haben.
Ich weiss wirklich nicht viel mehr zu sagen, ausser vielleicht folgendes:

- Liebe ist freiwillige Gabe, Schmeichelei Huldigung
- Drei Klassen von Narren: Die Männer aus Hochmut, das Mädchen aus Liebe, die Frauen aus Eifersucht
- Bist du nicht willig so brauch ich Gewalt
- Wenn wir uns selbst fehlen, fehlt uns doch alles.
- Was ich weiss kann jeder Wissen, mein Herz hab ich allein
- Die meisten verarbeiten den grössten Teil der zeit, um zu leben, und das bisschen, das ihnen von Freiheit übrig bleibt, ängstigt sie so, dass sie alle Mittel aufsuchen um es los zu werden.
- Das Äusserste liegt der Leidenschaft zu allernächst.

Carefree

We hit our last month together and suddenly everything feels light. It's weird how we're all ignoring failed relationships, old fights and flings, because we know that this is our last opportunity. Sure there are certain things that went too deep to forget, but for the most part we're just happy to have each other, new bounds begin to grow and weird couples and groups develop from that.
Today I went to the beach with Alaska and Marina, it was great, because we just did, there was no thinking behind it. I can't believe that it will be done soon. Marina will move back to San Francisco, Mikaela to Washington, Kelsey will stay for a bit but then she will be gone as well... I might move to San Francisco for a month, to get some money. At least the guys are staying here: Charles, Mike and Nicolas. And then of course I have my cast who cannot leave me till the end of June anyway (although Tessa does, she leaves to Australia at the 20th).
But anyway, it's good to feel the joy of life again. And the weather helps. Wonderful warm sunshine today. i found the right people, no discussion about that.
Enjoy your night. I will clean my apartment YEY